Dynamics of Healthy, Happy Families
Why Some Families Work Well Together
These families spend time together whenever they can, and seem to enjoy being together. Watching these families, one might wonder what makes these families successful. A lot depends on how much the individual members are willing to give to the family.
Commitment to Family
Individual members have a commitment to the family in families that work well. Members see the family as being important and worthy of the time and effort it takes to maintain healthy relationships within it. They take time to communicate, share, and listen to each other, and to build and observe traditions. They make an effort to be patient even when another family member seems cranky or out of sorts.
Family Members Show Love, Respect, Responsibility
Love for family members is unconditional. One member may not like the way another member behaves, but loves her anyway. Members may talk about another member's outrageous behavior with other family members, but they don’t want to hear anyone else say anything bad about her.
Members of functional families are responsible for making healthy decisions about their lives. They are responsible for their actions and their words because they know that both can affect other family members and society as a whole.
Successful families show respect for each member. They listen without interruption, and are polite when they disagree. They are considerate of the other person’s feelings, and show the other person that he or she is important. They remember that confidences are not to be shared. They do little things for one another.
Honesty in all family relationships
Communication is sincere and open. If members can’t depend upon their own family to be sincere and honest, they will not be able to trust anyone. Family members must also know when to keep their thoughts to themselves. A daughter-in-law may not appreciate advice on how to raise her children.
Families that work well are there for each other when a need arises. The need can be small, like a bad day at school, or major, like the loss of a job, loss of a loved one, or a serious illness. Whatever the need, family members are there to listen, cook a meal, tend the children, or do the laundry when they live close enough, or if they live far apart, they can be there by telephone or email.
It seems clear that happy families are those whose members take pride in their family and make a commitment to do their part to maintain its health. Members are honest, respectful toward one another, give love without conditions, and try to help other members when they need help. Healthy, happy families don't just happen; their members know how to give and how to take. They take pride in family and work to keep it healthy.
Check Better Health Channel for more information about the characteristics that healthy families share and for information about where to find help for families that aren't working well.
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