Men with abusive tendencies come in all shapes, sizes and colors, crossing all ethnic and age groups, often exhibiting controlling and angry behaviors that leave their wives and girlfriends physically beaten and battered, and emotionally distraught.
There are four types of abusive behaviors that men inflict on women they claim to love:
- Physical abuse or battering- involving shoving, pushing, kicking, hitting, grabbing, pulling hair and threatening bodily harm.
- Emotional or psychological abuse- including controlling a woman’s freedom to come and go as she pleases, brainwashing, spying or stalking her at work or with friends, monitoring phone calls.
- Sexual abuse or rape- physically forcing or coercing sexual favors against her will or with threat of violence if she does not comply, sexual acts following physical violence with or without harmful and painful devices without her consent.
- Damaging property- involving breaking household items, damaging walls, throwing objects at his victim or near enough to cause great fear of physical harm while in a rage.
Characteristics of Abusive and Manipulative Men-
Identifying characteristics of men who batter and carefully examining the early warning signs of men who abuse women with domestic violence, helps women around the world learn how to protect themselves and even their children from further abuse.
Abusive and manipulative men have a knack for blaming others for their violent tendencies, and over a period of time many women unfortunately buy into the belief that they themselves are somehow at fault, trying hard as they may to change themselves and their own behaviors in order to prevent another violent episode.
Clinical Studies and Prognosis for a Cure-
According to Lundy Bancroft’s book, Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men (Published by Berkley Trade, September 2003), ongoing studies of why men abuse women, as well as whether or not abusive men can be cured, do not provide much good news for women involved in these abusive relationships.
Men who abuse women are often very clever and highly charismatic, using manipulative tactics such as lying, blackmail, denial, projecting blame on others and exhibiting “Dr. Jekyl-Mr. Hyde” personality disorder behaviors that often make the women in their lives question their own sanity. Ladies, it is not your fault.
Anger Management and Couples Counseling Prove Ineffective-
Anger management classes designed for men who abuse women, as well as Couples Counseling for abusers have not been found to be very helpful long-term. In many cases these classes have increased the level of abuse on victims of violence due to the abuser’s warped perception of manhood and feeling embarrassed when required by the legal system to attend therapy group sessions for batterers.
Resource Information for Victims of Domestic Abuse
Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men (Published by Berkley Trade, September 2003) offers alarming statistics regarding domestic violence, sad-but-true prognosis for men who abuse women, as well as helpful resource information for women who are victims of abuse on ways to leave an abusive relationship.
Further Reading:
How to Hide Money From an Abusive Husband
