Put the Spark Back in Marriage
How to Keep the Newlywed Butterflies Alive in Your Relationship
Here are some things you and your spouse can do to keep the spark alive.
The excitement of a wedding and a honeymoon coupled with the wonderful feeling of “happily ever after” are par for the course when getting married. However once all the excitement dies down and regular life starts those newlywed butterflies go away. Eventually the lust wears off and the coulple is faced with the good and bad of a relationship.
But never fear because in many partnerships the butterflies come back. There are things a couple can do to help bring the spark back into every day life and keep it there.
Pamper Your Spouse
Many people who give relationship advice tell a man to bring his wife flowers for no reason because it reminds her that her husband was thinking of her. This is also a great tip for women. Men need to know they were missed during the day as well. During the day a woman should pick something up she knows her man will love; his favorite cookies, a sports magazine he’s been dying to read, etc. It's not just about the man pampering his woman. The man needs pampering as well. This shows the spouse that there is still everyday romance in a marriage.
Make Time for Quality Time
Quality time is obviously going to be different for every couple but this could even mean just watching television together after a long day instead of going separate ways in the evening. Cuddle on the couch and pop in a DVD of a favorite show, watch sports together or put in a movie. Going for a walk together is also nice because it gets the couple out of the house, exercising and is great for a one-on-one conversation.
Make Time for Passion
Every person knows just how easy it is to come home from a long day at work, change into pajamas and plop in front of the television. Although this is acceptable on some nights, if it becomes the norm then it’s incredibly easy for a couple to get into a passion rut. If a couple neglects their sex life, pretty soon there won’t be one. A couple must make time for this. After a few years of marriage it’s not as easy as it once was to be passionate with each other. The couple needs to make time now before there’s a rut that’s hard to get out of.
“Hot Date Night” is something every couple should implement. This could mean anything from a nice dinner and a show to just catching a movie together. The point of hot date night is to mix things up and take each other out for something that’s a little different. Hot date night could be once a week or a few times a month. There was a point in every couples past where they would set a date, fuss over what to wear and those pesky stomach butterflies were present. It’s time to recreate that!
Certified marriage mentor Jim Mueller touches on this subject in his article Strategic Romance. Mueller states, "At a minimum, you should set aside a weekly date night - you need that regular time to unwind and refocus on each other."
Every couple’s situation is different so pick a few new things to try and think outside the normal, everyday box.
